Aim high. Reach for the stars. Sí se puede. We’ve heard it all our lives. “You can do anything!”
We live in America, the land of opportunity, where all things are possible. It’s quite frankly a bit un-American to think anything different, right?
But motherhood changes everything. My definition of success no longer involves six figures and strategy sessions; it’s more along the lines of just getting my last kid out of diapers.
In today’s goal-oriented, success-obsessed culture, even mothers are not immune. We’re bombarded with images and ideas of what a “good” mom is even before our first child is born. We’re making tough choices on prenatal vitamins, preschool, and extracurricular activities. We’re balancing work and our own passions with giving our children everything we can. We’re planning the sweetest birthday parties, arranging toddler playdates, volunteering with our kids, making Pinterest-perfect crafts, and spending quality time cuddling on the couch and reading aloud.
And yet, it’s never enough.
There’s always this nagging feeling that we should be doing more. Whether it’s more to help our children academically, more home-cooked meals, or more hours and effort in the workplace, there’s a price to pay when mothers reach for the stars.
Usually, it’s our own sanity.
There’s a case to be made for the mediocre mom. She’s the mom who’s given up on striving and made peace with settling in.
The mediocre mom doesn’t do all the extras. She does the things that bring her joy and fill up her life and household with energy. If you’re the themed holiday cookie mom, get in the kitchen and bake. If you’re the slumber party mom, invite all the kids over. If you’re the weekend warrior DIY mom, get to work.
They key is to do what makes you smile from ear to ear and not what others think you should do.
The mediocre mom can’t do it all, and she’s more than OK with that.
She prioritizes and isn’t afraid to let others know how they can help. She empowers her children to do real work so she isn’t carrying the load of the household all on her own back. She knows that sitting down for a cup of tea or taking a nap in the middle of the day isn’t lazy, but the best form of self care she could give herself.
Mediocrity isn’t a bad place to be; it can be a stepping stone to happiness. Happiness comes from accepting and appreciating what you have and where you are in life.
When we can be content with our current state of motherhood, we allow ourselves room for more of the things that really matter: kisses, hugs, tickles, giggles, pillow fights, bedtime stories, deep conversations, and rest.
Motherhood is a lifetime commitment, but the season of hands-on, intensive mothering is a short one. Motherhood is full of sacrifices, and there will come a time when we can have a clean house again, enjoy a guilt-free girls’ trip, or even have an uninterrupted conversation.
Motherhood doesn’t mean life is on hold. But settling into motherhood is all about accepting the reality of what we’re capable of while devoting our attention to raising good, decent humans.
By all means, aim high. Reach for the stars. Sí se puede. We can do it all—just not right now.
