I Think I’m Going To Miss This

On March 6, 2020, the Friday before Spring Break, I picked up my kids from school not knowing it would be the last time I did that in a long, long time. 

A few days later, the entire world was shaken. Schools were closed, trips were rescheduled, weddings were postponed. Everything was canceled and our lives were put on hold as the world navigated a pandemic. 

Families were forced to stay home and adapt a new normalcy while places shut down, jobs disappeared, and people got sick. It was scary, but we adapted, we pivoted, and we managed to survive.

It’s been over six months now, and as things slowly start to get back to normal-ish, I can’t believe I’m going to say it, but amidst all this adversity, there’s a sliver of hope that makes me think I’m going to miss this. 

Back in March when my kids started doing virtual school, I remember wondering if it would last a week, a month, or a year. I don’t think anyone could foresee what was coming. My children never wanted to “school-from-home” and honestly, distance learning is not my thing either. I cannot wait for everything to go back to normal, I don’t like this, I don’t like this at all. But from a very selfish point of view, I dare to say that, when all of this is over, somehow, I think I’m going to miss it. 

I’m going to miss being home, our slow-paced mornings, and the conversations we have every day during lunch time. I’m going to miss having my family here all the time, the snuggles and the hugs, the unlimited movie nights, and the thousands of board games we’ve played. 

I’m going to miss all the blank spaces in my calendar, our free afternoons without having to run from one place to the other, and not having to rush them during dinner. I’m going to miss my kids being bored and watching them come up with new games. 

Sure, I’ve locked myself in the bathroom more times than I can count just to have some alone time. Of course I wish I could go out without having to wear a mask and hug people without worries. I miss a lot of things from our pre-COVID lives, but in some strange way, I’ve grown fond of this new reality.

I’ve learned that my kids need very little things to be happy. Sure, I wish we could see our friends and hang out with more people, but honestly, the ones that really matter never truly felt apart, and those who are away somehow feel closer now. 

Please don’t get me wrong, the virus and all the uncertainty that it brought with it can come to an end right now, but it is this same uncertainty that has thought me to appreciate the little things and to value the simplicity of this new way of life, because it made me realize that as long as we have each other, we are okay. 

This has been going on for six months and still, I have no idea when my kids will be back in school. In two weeks? Probably. Until next year? Also, possible. 

Are my kids driving me crazy somedays? Yes. 

Do I wish I didn’t have to figure out a way to explain common core math? Also yes. 

But there are way bigger struggles than being with our kids 24/7, and I would rather focus on the good that has come out of this because I’m aware that I’m very lucky to be able to feel this way. 

I like to look back to that ordinary day in March, when we did our ‘lasts’ of many things and wonder about the day when I can finally pick up my kids from school again. They will probably be wearing masks and things will be very different, too. I don’t know what’s going to happen or what things will look like then, but I do know that, when everything goes back to normal, I’m going to miss this.  

Born and raised in Mexico just two hours away from San Antonio, Alejandra moved to the Alamo City in 2010 with her husband. A year later they welcomed their first son, and in 2013 she officially became a mom of two boys. She has a degree in Communications from the University of Monterrey, and has worked as a writer and editor for both print and web media. A classically trained pianist, Alejandra currently freelances as a copy writer and translator. Favorite Restaurant: Palenque Grill Favorite Landmark: The Historic Pearl Favorite San Antonio Tradition: Fiesta de las Luminarias