So, You Married Your High School Sweetheart?

It’s a common question asked of couples: So, how did you meet? I suppose our answer—”we dated in high school”—isn’t as common as one would think. According to one online survey, our circumstance describes no more than 14% of people who “met at school.” Moreover, this particular report indicates that people who marry their high school sweethearts are more than likely going to divorce if they marry before the age of 25.

Well, we dated in high school, got married right after college, and are getting ready to celebrate our eighth wedding anniversary with our two beautiful children. So, not to just throw out those statistics, but the numbers simply don’t apply to our situation. In fact, a lot of assumptions and questions about people who marry their high school sweethearts don’t seem to apply to our situation. Here are a few we’ve come across over the years:

1. Aren’t you afraid your children will get married too young? Not unless of course you mean right now, because currently they are three years and six months old, respectively. Yes, that would be too young. Besides, our daughter has only expressed interest in marrying either “Daddy” or “Baby Brother,” so those would really be the bigger issues, right?

2. Don’t you get bored with each other? Growing up, I remember hearing the phrase “only boring people are bored.” We have enough interests outside of our relationship and ourselves to keep each other occupied and learning from one another on a daily basis, not to mention a shared sense of humor that can keep things amusing for ages. I still laugh at the same joke I heard back in 1998.

3. The question they are really asking when they inquire about boredom: Don’t you get tired of each other—you know—in bed?
No. Next question.

4. What happens if you grow apart?
I don’t know; I’ll let you know if it ever happens. I imagine we would do what any other couple might and start by talking about it.

5. Do you ever wish you had dated more people?
From what I hear, dating isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Almost six million google search results can’t be wrong.

6. So, you guys went to the same college?
We weren’t always married. We weren’t always “together.” We ended up at two different schools that are nearly 750 miles apart, but that didn’t stop him from driving all that way to see me for the weekend.

7. So, you knew each other in high school?
Yes, we’ve already established this. I swear we’ve been asked this question just as much as the sex question, which always seems to come in at #1.

8. Awww, that’s so cute?
I guess so… I’ve noticed this is less of a question and more of a statement but with that rising intonation that makes it sound like a question.

9. So, how long have you been together?
I think they’re just trying to figure out how old we are. Currently it has been 16 years since we first started dating. (They quickly do the math… “OK, so you’re 31?”).

10. So, you married your high school sweetheart?
This is a slightly different question than #7; it’s more a sentiment of congratulations mixed with nostalgia. It should be noted that almost everyone has that first love or crush. For some people it’s “the one who got away,” and for others it’s “thank God I got away.” For us, it’s the one that just kept going, and now we have a loving, growing family to show for it. For that, I count us among the luckiest.

lukeandlina

Celina
Celina is a “professional volunteer” serving on multiple nonprofit boards and advisory groups. In her former life she started a nonprofit, which she left last year in the most capable of hands where it continues to thrive. In another past life she was a host and reporter for Texas Public Radio. She’s a “native” Texan and life-long San Antonio Girl. She attended school in Chicago where all she did was talk about how great Texas is. Her husband, Luke, is her high school sweetheart and the most supportive spouse you’ll ever meet. They have two children whom words can’t currently describe, but keep reading and you’ll get a pretty good idea who they are becoming.

13 COMMENTS

  1. My hubby and I started dating when I was 15 and he was 18. That was almost 37 years ago:) Married when I was 18 and he was 21. Just celebrated our 34th anniversary last weekend. I feel very blessed to have married my best friend. We just have too much invested in each other to give up when things get tough. I feel like in many ways, we “grew up” together and with each other. All of our adult years have been together, you know?

  2. Met working at a grocery store at 17, married him 8 years later. 10 years together this April. I had so many people tell me I should date other people, it made me angry then but now I laugh. I knew enough then not to mess with a good thing. I’m still not sure how dating other people was supposed to enrich my life, as the saying goes, comparison is the thief of joy.

  3. My husband and I were high school sweethearts, married shorty after I graduated college, and have been married nine years. We have two wonderful children and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve always said that you either grow apart or grow together during those college years. We grew together.

  4. We will celebrate 15 years as a couple next month, but we met when I transferred to a new school in 3rd grade. We’ve known eachother form over 75% of our lives, and have two wonderful children now too. It’s not easy, but who said anything worthwhile was easy?

    • Happy anniversary to you and your hubs, Rebecca! Fifteen years is an amazing feat for marriage; I’m impressed you even started dating him after the “he pushed you because he likes you” stage. Best wishes and here’s to another fifteen!

  5. I married my high school sweetheart too. We dated 5 1/2 years, and got married 4 weeks after my college graduation.
    And, we’ve loved each other through his degree, my career, his career, buying and remodeling a house, 5 dogs, 2 kids, Desert Shield/Storm, 9/11, soccer, baseball, Boy Scouts, gifted testing, ADHD testing, Honor Roll, Deans List, speech therapy, couples therapy, promotions, layoffs, aging parents, student government elections, college board testing, and…oh, yeah, cancer.
    We celebrate 24 years this June. Hard? Yes. Fun? Heck yeah. Boring? Never.

    • Jamie, I can only say how inspiring it is to hear about two people who have faced pretty much EVERYTHING together and are still celebrating their love for one another. Congratulations and I hope you have something very special planned for June!

  6. My husband and I met at 13 were friends all through school dated and broke up and then moved in together the summer after graduating. We have been together 18 years now, have 2 awesome boys and although the road continues to have unexpected road blocks and curves….no one will ever replace pur love for one another. We often tell each other that we saved one another as both of us had really hard childhoods.

    • Amanda, thank you for sharing your story! Your two boys are so lucky to have two parents that are so committed to love. What a way to break the cycle and build a family together.

  7. My husband and I met when I was 13. He was 15. We’ve been inseparable since. We will celebrate our 21 yr anniversary next week. I married my best friend and am so lucky to have grown up beside him. I would never trade my life with my junior high school sweetheart for another. He’s my happily ever after!

  8. Yes, I married my high school sweetheart and I can top your answer to how we met. We met in third grade.

    Yes, third grade. We were 8. We married in 1990, the year after high school graduation. We divorced in 2011 and reconciled 6 months later. We remarried and are best friends.

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