Already Worried About Middle School? I Was Too: 7 Things That Pleasantly Surprised Me About the 6th Grade

This month, my daughter is finishing the sixth grade—her first year of middle school. I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t scared out of my mind before this school year started. You’ve surely heard all of the horror stories about it. Middle school is no joke. It’s the perfect storm of hormones igniting, teachers who are less warm and fuzzy than their elementary counterparts, and a curriculum that is more college-like than anything I ever did in actual college.

So, when I put my daughter on the school bus (her idea) the first day of middle school back in August, I wept like a baby. I felt just like I did when I sent her off to Kindergarten:

Will anyone bother to get to know my baby, or will she be just a student ID number?

Will she get lost?

Will she make friends?

Will she be too afraid to ask where the bathrooms are?

These concerns were the same ones that I had seven years earlier.

But, amazingly, middle school has left me pleasantly surprised. It’s too easy to look back on our own middle school experiences and project these onto our kids. The thing is, though, the middle school of today is way different (for better or worse) than the middle school that most of us experienced, and in many ways, it feels like my daughter is better equipped than I was to navigate both the educational and social hurdles of junior high.

So, while she did have a few hiccups in adjusting to middle school this year, there were also many things that pleasantly surprised me about her experience. In no particular order (lies—the first thing is probably my favorite thing about middle school), here are a few things that I’ve loved about my daughter’s sixth grade year and middle school:

No signing agendas or reading logs. Yes, moms! You read it here first! Lord have mercy, you’re done with signing reading logs and agendas! For middle school, my daughter has an agenda, but it’s for her own use and I rarely ever even need to look at it. In fact, very little paperwork even comes home for me to sign or deal with (see #2 below).

A budding sense of independence. Both personally and educationally, my daughter has become so much more independent, thanks to middle school. In our experience, the teachers give the students assignments and don’t send the parents many (if any) details about it. At first, that made the control freak, perfectionist part of my mom brain twitch, but I quickly realized that it’s my daughter’s responsibility to get her work done and throwing her in the deep end was the best way to teach her this.

The social scene isn’t as scary as I expected. We all remember how socially awkward middle school was. The thing is, I’m sure it still is, but in this day and age, there seems to be a little more room to be quirky. For instance, my daughter joined the robotics team at the beginning of the school year and they advanced to the state meet. That packed arena in Dallas was full of (for a lack of better terms) nerds, geeks, and Neo-Maxi Zoom Dweebies (my daughter very much included), who were all absolutely living their very best lives. They were surrounded by the support and love of their coaches, parents, and peers, and my heart swelled a bit. It was refreshing to see just as much enthusiasm at this event as any middle school sporting event.

The use of cell phones (and other devices). This could really seem like a bad thing, but it turned out not to be, in our case. I begrudgingly allowed my daughter to take her phone the first day of middle school, mainly so she could listen to music on the bus (instead of whatever else there is to listen to on the middle school bus—yikes!). But it turned out that she was able to text me at lunch to check in, which really set my mind at ease that first day of school. Also, I can tell her to email a teacher if she has a question or needs to come in for tutoring (again, see #2 above), taking the responsibility off of me.

The homework load isn’t that bad. (This one comes directly from my daughter.) The fear of homework overkill almost paralyzed my daughter before she started middle school. She was so afraid that she’d have mountains of senseless, busy work homework every night. Thankfully, we’ve found that, while she does often have homework, it’s usually just work that she didn’t finish in class and it’s almost always over material that was covered in class.

It’s pretty fun. She went to her first school dance this year. There are pep rallies, sporting events, and clubs to join. Even the teachers and principals seem to let loose a little more with the kids and show their relatable, fun sides—all the while still running a tight ship.

There’s a fresh mix of kids from other schools. By the time fifth grade rolled around, everyone at our elementary school was tired of everyone else. Moving on to a middle school with kids from other elementary schools has helped to refresh the friend pool. While my daughter’s core group of friends are still kids who went to her elementary, she’s made several friends who went to different elementary schools.

All in all, sixth grade has been an easier transition than any of us expected. My daughter rose to its challenges, made new friends, and experienced new things. While I’m sure the next couple of years will hold their fair share of struggles for her, sixth grade set my daughter up for success, and so far, middle school is really not as scary as it might seem.   

 

Jenny
Jenny is a 40-something, married mother of two (Anna, 2007 and Jack, 2009), who migrated to the Hill Country after doing a 14 year stint in Houston. When Jenny isn’t walking her slightly neurotic (and completely beloved) rescued Weimaraner, she enjoys writing, making to-do lists, and folding laundry (and sarcasm). Jenny holds a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Texas A&M University--Corpus Christi, and completed graduate coursework in Guidance and Counseling. She is a freelance writer who writes a weekly pet column for a Houston newspaper, and is a contributor at Dog Friendly San Antonio, New Braunfels Monthly and San Antonio Woman, as well as assorted other publications. You can also find her on Instagram (introvertsguidetosobriety). Favorite Restaurant: Bohanan's Favorite Landmark: The Alamo (duh) Favorite San Antonio Tradition: Wurstfest (not technically SAT, but closer to Jenny's stomping grounds).