This post is brought to you by Betty Co.
Navigating puberty and periods with your pre-teen is a process.
Exactly when she might be inducted into the bleeding-girls club will be unique to them. On average, though, a first period comes along about two years after breast development begins, typically between the ages 12 and 14. A recent study found a shift in the average age of menarche (aka, that *first* period) – from 12.9 years old to 11.9 years old.
If introducing periods to your pre-teen feels overwhelming, you’re not alone. It’s easy to delay talking about reproductive cycles and period care when stigma often surrounds such topics, and as parents, we don’t always have all the answers.
Am I using the right terms?
What if they ask a clinical question I can’t answer?
Will I share too much or little?
What have they already learned from school, peers, and social media?
Where do I even start?!
Menstruation can be an indicator for overall health — just like blood pressure or heart rate. So, properly learning about the female anatomy, menstruation, and period management is critical to raising a healthy, thriving young woman.
While it may seem overwhelming, with the right approach, you can empower your daughter to embrace this natural process with confidence and ease. Here are five essential tips to prep your daughter for her first period.
1) NORMALIZE PERIODS
You can reduce period stigma and encourage open discussion with your pre-teen by simply sharing and initiating conversation about menstruation.
Need to take five for period cramps? Feel empowered to share just why you’re resting. Call out dialogue that makes your period the butt of the joke (“Oh, it must be that time of the month!”). Be emboldened to carry that tampon on your way to the bathroom. Proudly display your period product of choice near the sink or toilet.
You normalize periods by speaking on, and demonstrating how, they intersect with everyday life. For menstruators, periods are integral features of life, so why should we feel the need to tip-toe around this huge part of our health?
2) BOOK A VISIT WITH A GYNECOLOGIST
Let’s be honest, some pre-teens may be more inclined to listen to an outside voice, especially if the topic is a bit sensitive. Leaning on an expert to introduce menstruation and answer all of her questions can also take the weighty task of explaining period basics off your plate.
Seeing a gynecologist early establishes the patient-provider relationship they’ll need as they navigate reproductive health topics throughout their teens and twenties. This rapport also sets a cadence for recommended routine annual visits (which should start between ages 13-15!).
Some gynecology practices even have special services designed to provide tailored advice for young girls, like Betty’s Co. and our First Period Consults.
3) EXPLORE PERIOD CARE PRODUCTS
There are so many options beyond pads and tampons! Introducing the various types of period products together can help illustrate the many ways your daughter can and should care for their body during menstruation.
Next time you’re out shopping together, take a stroll down the period product aisle to explore the different options. Have your pre-teen pick out one to try at home! Encouraging her to experiment with different products will allow your daughter to find what works best for her comfort and lifestyle.
4) CREATE A SUPPORTIVE HOME ENVIRONMENT
Stocking up on period care products not only ensures that they are available when the time comes (especially for any surprise bleeds or leaks!) but helps normalize their presence in the household.
For school and outings, consider creating an emergency period kit using a mini makeup bag or pencil pouch and filling it with a small stash of products that can easily be kept in their school backpack.
Just like keeping a supply of toilet paper and tissues, having a regular stock of period care products on hand can make a new menstruator feel comfortable reaching for them.
5) SET UP CYCLE TRACKING
Teaching your pre-teen how to monitor their full menstrual cycle (not just the days they bleed!) allows them to anticipate what proactive care and prep they can take to plan around their period, avoid surprises, and manage PMS symptoms.
Create a special journal, calendar, or download a tracking app that includes daily tracking of moods, cravings, and days of menstruation. Bonus points for joining them in tracking so you can share how each of your cycles is unique!
As a parent, puberty and periods can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to do this work alone! Consider booking a First Period Consult with your pre-teen as the first step towards supporting their menstrual journey.
The earlier you normalize periods, prepare your daughter for managing them, and establish annual gynecology visits, the more empowered they are to care for themselves during their teens and twenties.
Betty’s is a women’s health company for women+ in their teens and twenties. We provide the care they need from period until pregnancy, with a vision to normalize “women’s health” for younger women+. Our care includes gynecology, mental health, and wellness. We aim to be the most present and convenient option for care. So, we provide both telehealth and in-person care through a customized experience designed to meet young women’s needs.
